Shadows On the Grass by Simon Raven

Author:Simon Raven
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: House of Stratus

As the days passed and excitement mounted among gentlemen of the fancy, Spotty emerged a clear favourite at 6 to 4 on, though respectable sums were invested on James (by those who could still find them) at 7 to 4 against. As much as 100 to 1 was offered in some quarters against a tie, and 500 to 1 (generally thought to be rather mean odds) against the death of one Contestant. I myself staked two Rupees (about three shillings), at 2,000 to 1, on both Principals dropping dead and ten Rupees (all I could raise for the purpose) on a victory for Spotty at even money – a price briefly on offer when a rumour that Spotty had the clap (started by me) caused fluctuations in the market.

‘Damned disloyal I call that,’ said James when he heard.

‘One has to take the practical view. I know you’re a reliable drinker but you haven’t quite had Spotty’s experience.’

‘I don’t get drunk, if that’s what you mean.’

‘It’s exactly what I mean. There’s nothing in the Laws saying the winner has to be sober, only that he mustn’t be sick or pass out. Spotty has had practice – almost every night he has practice – at getting drunk, i.e. drinking the stuff by the bucket, without being sick or passing out. You have had no such practice. You’re not even having it now.’

‘I don’t have to make a hog of myself just because of the Match.’

‘But you will have to make a hog of yourself in order to win it. You might at least find out what it feels like…have the odd net, so to speak.’

‘But you don’t want James to win,’ said Sandy spitefully; ‘you’ve backed Spotty Duvell. So why are you giving him all this advice?’

‘Because I don’t want to see Spotty Duvell walk all over him. The honour of Charterhouse is at stake here. James must put up a good show. What on earth will Hedley Le Bas say,’ I said to James, ‘if he hears you’ve collapsed after the first few rounds of a public Drinking Match? Whatever would Bags Birley feel about it?’

‘I fear lest Bags would deprecate the whole proceeding,’ said James, ‘whatever the result.’

‘Not if you win. To win is to succeed, and as you yourself once told me, success brings its own exculpation.’

‘So in the last resort…you really want me to win – although you’ve had a bet against me?’

‘That’s about it.’

‘It makes no sort of sense.’

‘It makes admirable sense,’ I said, ‘it means financial emolument in case of personal disappointment. By the same token, I’ve also had a bet that you and Spotty will both fall down dead. Should this sorrowful calamity occur, 2,000 Rupees would at least be some kind of compensation.’

The day before the match it became clear that if everyone who wanted to attend were to be allowed in, Napier Mess would totter to the ground. The entire Transit Camp was buzzing with almost hysterical excitement, and literally hundreds of pounds’

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